So I’ve only been a stay-at-home-dad (SAHD) for about 2 months. There are many things I have learned (another post) but surprising are the things people say and ways they react when I tell them I stay at home. Perhaps I am still getting used to it but at times the things people say and do are a bit awkward.
So, want to make a SAHD squirm?
1. Call him “Mr. Mom.” It doesn’t matter how much you like Lonestar’s song or how much he can relate to it these words will rankle him for days.
2. Put down your husband. Its pretty awkward when you are simply trying to do your best as a husband and parent and another woman is putting down her husband in front of you. First of all, we all have faults. Secondly, women shouldn’t gripe about their husbands to other men. Build him up! Encourage him!
3. Put down his wife. Major no-no. He is committed to raising a family and being everything she needs him to be at home. Many women who work feel incredibly torn about the decision to be away from their kids during the workday. She is not to blame. He would not be willing to stay at home with the kids if she were not an amazing woman who was worth every diaper change, homework lesson, temper tantrum and bowl of mac n’ cheese.
4. Act surprised when he does something well. Despite a recent emphasis on egalitarian roles in the home, people are still shocked when dads can do pony-tails, pig-tails and braids. If a dad has “decorative flair” they ask for his “man card.” When he irons out creases, sows on buttons and mops floors they are amazed that someone with a Y-chromosome can be so domestic. Yup. We can.
5. Pity him. There could be any number of reasons a dad becomes the stay at home parent. After 2 months and following a number of blogs, tweets, websites and Facebook pages, here is what I have realized. The good ones are proud of their role and they commit themselves to creating a home environment that glorifies God. Pity doesn’t help them disciple their kids or lift up their spouse.
There you have it. Any other SAHD’s out there have things that make them squirm? Have any stories of times you made a SAHD squirm? Let’s hear em’!
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