Is it Better to Need or to Want Sex?

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Here’s the question which drove our discussion this morning in my sex therapy class:
When it comes to being needed and being wanted, which is a heathier perspective when it comes to sexual experience?

I will post more later but its interesting to hear different ideas of what is behind sexual intention. How is our view of sex impacted whether we view it from a “need-based” perspective or a “want-based” perspective?

I understand that this discussion is a bit more frank than others but hopefully the diablogue will be insightful and eye-opening.


About joshkellar

I'm married to an incredible woman of God and have two daughters that love to laugh and delight in the Lord. My goal in life is to bring others into closer relationship with God by engaging them in His story as we journey together in a faith-filled community. The basis for every decision I make in life comes back to my calling to share the love of God with those around me. My hope is that at every opportunity I will encourage others into a greater lifelong journey of discipleship.

Posted on April 26, 2006, in Uncategorized and tagged . Bookmark the permalink. 3 Comments.

  1. Hey, you should check out today’s entry on Mike Cope’s blog. He was taking about the broad topic of sex.

  2. Not that I am anywhere near the expert on this topic, but I am going to have to say that it is “both.”“Need” in that without it the population eventually fades into oblivion.“Want” in that it is one of the most intimate forms of communication two individuals will ever be able to express in the lives of each other when putting the other’s needs first… (at least that is what I hear)

  3. Interesting. I can’t wait to hear what your class discussion came up with.So my initial response was Want, because I thought that if it was a wanting thing than the other person would feel special in being wanted. However, then I thought about it and wondered, want is very selfish in nature. Think of a child (or some of us adults) “I want, I want, I want”. So I changed my mid to Need, but I can’t really explain it. I look forward to your insight

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